Sunday, August 4, 2013

A picture is really worth a thousand words

I’ve heard it too many times when people see our family: “you’re so incredible, inspirational, amazing”. This is not my hope for what you see when you see our family out and about, read my blog, or see our family picture; because this is not what is true. I am not above or beyond reach. I am not some higher level of extraordinary. We are not on a different “level” of Christianity that anyone else.  Not even close.

When you see us I pray you see:
-an imperfect family made up of imperfect people who all came from brokenness and are on different journeys to healing and wholeness.
-a picture that now has smiles, but that came out of suffering, trauma, and abandonment. We walked through (and still walk through) seasons of challenge, difficulty and hardships.
-an adoption that journeyed through the deepest of pain. We cast out demons, we witnessed trauma, we had moments where we wanted to quit, throw in the towel, return to an ‘easier life’.
-relationships that sometimes require a will to love rather than relying on a fleeting emotion of love.
-two parents who are not “saviors” of our children. Only two saved by a Great God and in the overflow of the love he gives us, we also give to all of our children.
-a marriage that is not perfect, but that strives to love and serve each other through difficulty rather than having an option of getting out.
-two parents that do not have it all together, have all the answers, and even the “wisdom” we do have is not put into practice at all times.
-a journey that took me to the bottom of myself, showed me the depth of depravity and a time where I was forced to stare at the worst of my thoughts, emotions and actions.

But also I hope you see:
-that saying yes to God is not drudgery and pain. It is freeing and fun. It leads to a life that we could not imagine before stepping out in what He calls us to.
-love is not confined to our own genetic makeup. (I mean, I love my husband don’t I? :)
-races really can coexist in unity and beauty. That the least of these can become the greatest. That Jesus really is where he says he is and who he says he is.
-you really can still focus on and enjoy your marriage with 4 little ones running around vying for your every ounce of energy.
-living the ‘comfortable’ life with 2.4 perfect kids and a easily explained existence is really not the best life God had for us.
-trading in my comforts and areas of safety is worth giving all I have to Jesus and my family.
-it is worth the stares, the family members that may not have understood, the friends that told us we may be getting in over our heads, and the challenges we faced to be honored to parent all 4 of our kids.
-that we did not ruin our kids lives by opening our hearts and homes to ‘orphans’, God has opened their hearts to far more.

I hope you see yourself in our adoption, just like I have. The brokenness and pain that was exchanged for belonging and family. The acceptance and unconditional love they now have access to. That Jesus wants to give that to all of us if we allow ourselves to leave what binds us and trade in for a life of freedom and a family far greater than any on this earth. It is merely the tiniest of glimmers of the love and life he has for us.
I am so grateful to be adopted by Jesus. I can not nor do I intend to be the savior in my own equation. I pray my broken, imperfect life points my children to a whole, perfect God. 
So look closely. What is God calling you to see? What does your life say about Him? What is the truth behind the smiles? Lets trade in the masks we wear for the truth of the journey we are on. He receives far more glory and our chains of performance are gone.

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1 comment:

  1. Love you! Beautiful. Ready to go get some more kiddos with ya! Heehee