Monday, September 5, 2011

No guarantees

Life doesn't come wrapped in a pretty bow.  God doesn't allow life here to be heaven, this is not heaven.  Heaven is yet to come and heaven is guaranteed perfect.  Life here however, come with no guarantees.  I have been surprised the several responses from strangers and friends alike about what we are getting into in adoption. I think these are normal reactions to a new venture. John and I have thought through scenario after scenario of what this could be like, but then we got to a point of just trusting... wondering and worrying was only taking me to a place of fear, and His love casts out fear, so I will rest there.  I think it is interesting how our culture is coming around adoption.  We would never hear the news of someone expecting their first child and then bombard them with stories of still borns, down syndrome babies, and terminal illness in toddler-hood. However, this is some of the types of responses we have gotten. Horror stories of "adoption gone wrong" or hidden diseases or children who end up turning on their parents.  God has again taken me to a place of rest and trust.  Life doesn't come with a guarantee.  My marriage didn't come with a guarantee of health or longevity of our lives. I watched my dear friend die right before their 4th wedding anniversary.  Our kids didn't come with a guarantee of health, long lives, or a guarantee of what choices they will make down the line.  I spoke to a girl last weekend who buried their 5 month old fetus.  Just the same as our adoption doesn't come with a guarantee. Our child or children may have hidden illnesses not mentioned in a report, or may want to hop the first plane back to Congo when they turn 18. Or, just maybe our child will grow in a home where they accept Christ, flourish, and grow to make a impact for the Kingdom with their story. I don't know what their story will be.  I have accepted these things only because this is what God has called us to do, and as he has called us, he has given us peace to handle those situations if they arise.  But i also know he works for the good of those he loves.  If pain is part of our good, i will walk in that. But we want to, as a family, love on this child or children no matter what they look like, what ailment they might have, or how long they might be with us on this earth. Just as Christ has painted so beautifully in the Gospel.  He called us out, adopted us into his family even when we were at our worst. We had all sorts of "hidden diseases", "attachment disorders", and baggage.  Yet with his love, we had a transformation.
I am so excited to love on these children just as we get to love on the ones we already have. To teach them who made them so beautiful and special, to point them to the One who has allowed our family to be different and unique, and to give them a home that is welcoming and a love that is unconditional. It will be a challenge, and there will be days when it will be tough, we have seen that on our journey thus far in our 7 years of marriage and 5 years of parenthood.  That is just part of life I guess. But I am so glad to be following a Big God, who knows the stories of our life and knows just how to handle each bump, fear and failure. There are no guarantees in this life on earth, but such an amazing guarantee of the God who gave himself for us, and let us trade places with his perfect son, so that we could be called sons and daughters.

2 comments:

  1. Dear friend -
    Stay strong in your faith!! Sounds like you are persevering through!! He will not take you places alone - He will walk every step with you! Praying for you!!

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  2. Awesome Kylie. I listened to a webcast this week talking about turning our worry into wonder.... how is God going to show himself in this, what will He bring out of each and every circumstance! Praying for you all!

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