I feel like i could explode, God has been revealing so much to me. It reminds me of when Reese asked about God making the whole earth/sky/space. He is big enough to make all that and he fits inside our hearts? How can something so big fit in my heart so small? EXACTLY!! IT CAN'T! It will burst out and overflow everywhere. THe beauty of the design.
I am about to finish up Radical, by David Platt. And that is what it is....Radical. I shared with someone about Katie Davis (blog is here kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com) and their response? She is crazy. At first I took offense. Then I thought, well YES she is. Do we want to look like the world's definition of fitting in? No thanks. But that is what we have been doing for years. I'd rather look a little crazy.
In the preschool pick up line on Tuesday a woman asked me how many kids I have? I answered 2, 18 months apart. She said wow, that mustv'e been tough. Yes it was, tough, amazing, challenging, and beautiful all at the same time. She said "well you must be done having kids then!" I laughed to myself, and answered, "well I thought so, but we are in the process of adoption". Her response, "that is so admirable! wow!". Admirable? Really? To obey God's command to care for the fatherless? Its not admirable. Its MY priviledge to follow him in obedience. So I proceeded to answer more of her questions. "yes, two treasures from Africa." The look on her face was priceless. TWO?? AFRICA?? Her admirable comment quickly was retracted based on her facial expression and then I got the "You're crazy" look southernly sugar coated with her words that reluctantly spilled out..."whoa, wow, well good...for...you" I could see her trying to keep a smile on her face but struggling! I just kept chuckling inside.
Thank you God for rescuing me from myself. Thank you for taking me away from that place. Thank you for teaching me that my comfort is not your number one goal for the world. I'll gladly be crazy in everyone's eyes if it means I get the joy and honor to give the ultimate discipleship to 2 children that would be staring at the walls of an orphanage for the next 13-16 years. Seriously? I get to do that? I'll take crazy any day.
So, the book radical is "radically" shaking my walls down of what I was taught Christianity looks like and what we see it as today. Is it seriously just a Christian spin on the american dream? Are we really missing the God of the Bible? There was a part in the book that really stood out to me. He was talking about how we cling to the verses that "He has a plan for our life" "he wants to let our joy be abundant" "he will give us peace that passes understanding" etc. Yes, those verses were written just for us. But then the verses about Defending the cause of the fatherless, pure religion being the care of orphans and widows, that really loving him is serving the least of these, that God wants all his lost sheep found. Well these verses you have to pick and choose what the Lord has "called YOU to". Oh man have we missed it! God has not only called the missionary or the adoptive family. God has called A-L-L his followers to this kind of radical obedience.
Do we really want to get to the end of our lives and say, yep God, i had my 2.4 kids, lived in a nice home, ate great food, saved our money well for retirement, tithed most of the time, and payed off our credit cards? Man.
Jesus has so much more for us if we truly follow his lead. He cared for the diseased, the dying, the atheists, the hypocrites, the children, the sinners, the homeless and prostitutes. My life sure doesn't reflect that very well.
John and I sat on the couch last night and I balled my eyes out as we talked about radically responding and shifting our lives around the lost, the least of these, and the orphans. Just because we are adopting, I don't want to feel like i can put a check mark on these things. This is just one way we are reflecting it. But I want to give 'til it hurts to these things that Jesus valued. I want to look back on our life and say that we lived well yes, comfortably at times too, but we poured ourselves out to the least of these. Because if I really want to love Jesus, he told me how. FOR ME, not for my neighbor or the missionary down the street. It is a command, not an optional buy in for Christianity. And the cool thing is, is that the command doesn't burden me. It frees me. It fills me with joy and purpose, it is actually delightful. It is not just a chore on a to do list. The more I have obeyed, the more God gives me of himself. And let me tell you, it is WAY better than food, the newest clothes, iPad or vacation. I have been EXPLODING and bursting out as Reese says, with the Love of God and It is such an honor to walk towards him in obedience and delight!